Today has been absolutely exhausting and it all started on my morning drive into work. I have always found that the first song I hear in the morning somehow sets the tone for the rest of my day ... and Highway to Hell was the last song I would have chosen to start my Wednesday. And if that wasn't bad enough, the next song they had to play was by YES which only served to depress me further, as it reminded me of someone I was once very connected to. But that's life, right? You win some and you lose some and you're supposed to be thankful for the opportunity alone. At least that is what they say. But how do you know what they say is right when you don't even know who these "they" are?
It's better to have loved and lost then to have never known love at all.
I know you've all heard that little speck of wisdom many times before ... But tell me, how many of you actually agree? Sometimes I wonder why we need to go through these little life lessons because I certainly know that I could do without some disappoinment in my life. Now you and I both know that perfect does not exist ... It's just not possible to achieve perfection. Although some of us will try and try and try to find it, either in ourselves or in somebody else that we can live vicariously through. But we'll never have it! We just try to get as close to it as we possibly can. Which brings me to my point because somewhere in this mess of convoluted thoughts I actually have one.
For those of you who have yet to find "THE ONE" let me ask you a question. If you found someone who intrigued your mind, could make you smile and laugh as if you hadn't a care in the world, and made you feel as if you had always known them since the very first time your souls were pulled out of the clay of this earth, would you walk away from this person if there were just one thing about them you couldn't accept? It's a concept I like to think of as the "Everything Minus One Clause" ... What do you do? Do you hold out for all your ideals or do you grab on to what you have because perfect doesn't exist?
Unofficial polls rate women more realistic in the whole scheme of things. Women are much more forgiving than men when it comes to who they fall in love with. They don't need the 6 pack body or even a man with a full head of hair as long as that man serves their basic needs to love, nurture, laugh and live a full joyful life. Men on the otherhand want the package deal. They want Barbie and all the accessories that go along with her. (Most men anyway, however I grant there are a few out there who know the real deal when they see it.) But real women can't compete with a plastic doll and ideals that are so out of whack that for many they are not humanly possible. Does this mean that everything else we had to offer is nothing? That we are unworthy of loving and being loved in return. Are we destined then to become spinsters with cats in every corner of our rooms, sitting lonely each and every Friday night watching infomercial repeats?
Shit. I didn't think I could further depress myself but what do you know, there was still a little room left. If it wasn't so damn late (hey people this is a work night after all) I'd throw on Moulin Rouge to cheer me up ... Course the ending always does me in but it's the inbetween that counts. Because ...
The Greatest Thing You'll Ever Learn Is To Love And Be Loved In Return.
** Alarm Clock Log **
Set for 5:30 a.m. Shut off at 5:17 a.m. Overslept and woke at 6:14 a.m.and Spent the rest of the day trying to catch up. **
Trying to watch the State of the Union address but having a hard time getting past the fact that G.W.B. is just NOT an exciting public speaker to watch. He needs pizazz, he needs to get loud and put it out there. Fist slamming, foot stomping, I'm going to tell you what I have to tell you without putting you to sleep pizazz. And for the sake of the country, crack a smile! It may be serious stuff but it's ok to go ahead and move your lips ...Make me believe what you're saying, change my mind on how I view your term of service, motivate me to stand behind your ideals and call them my own. Do something for goodness sake! I'm an open minded liberal, I'm bound to cut you some slack somewhere but you've got to give me some passion!
I am starting to realize that ever so slowly commercials and radio advertising are taking over what is left of my brain. For some reason the "Hello Moto" thing has been stuck in my head since I woke up way too darn early this a.m. (See alarm clock log at bottom.) So of course that was my greeting for the entire morning to each and every last one of my (lucky) co-workers. Having been at my current place of employment for a number of years now, they are quite used to my somewhat bizarre behavior. In fact, they have even adopted a ceremonial head shaking thing that seems to happen unconsciously now whenever I enter a room. Some have even mastered complete 360 degree eye rolls to go along with their, "She's so not right" expressions. As for me, I just smile and take it all in.
However, I do like to constantly remind my "9 to 5" companions, that I am like a little burst of sunshine within our office, helping to make the day go by just a little bit faster. That is of course, when it's not like watching paint dry for 9 hours. Which it most definitely was today. Today's work load was non-existant, unless you count numerous games of free cell, occasional phone conversations where heavy breathing seemed appropriate and a few spare moments to prune the plants in my office before it could be classified a wild refuge reserve.
But thankfully I am once again home. Dinner has been cooked, consumed and cleaned up after, all in one fell swoop. (Striking a Super Girl pose.) The minor child is currently torturing our resident cat, Emma. Tonight's ensemble consists of one lace bib sans dress, red ribbons and the unfortunate placing of multi-colored hair ties attached to all 4 paws. (You didn't think I was talking about the minor child did you?)
I'm almost inclined to save the cat from further humiliation but she looks like she is enjoying her play time. OK ... Maybe that is stretching the truth somewhat. But I am exacting my revenge for her latest escapade which involved one closet and several clothing carrying hangers which were mysteriously found on the floor last evening. Closets are now completely off limits to little black cats who formerly used said quarters for an afternoon nap.
I must go now and make some hot cocoa to heat myself back up. These frigid temperatures for the past few weeks have left me mostly numb all the way down to my toes. But that as they say, is life in the great Northeast.
** Alarm Clock Log **
5 a.m. Ringer, Snoozed Twice, Turned off Once and Out of Bed Approximately 10 or so Minutes Later. Not at all bad for a Tuesday.
However, I do like to constantly remind my "9 to 5" companions, that I am like a little burst of sunshine within our office, helping to make the day go by just a little bit faster. That is of course, when it's not like watching paint dry for 9 hours. Which it most definitely was today. Today's work load was non-existant, unless you count numerous games of free cell, occasional phone conversations where heavy breathing seemed appropriate and a few spare moments to prune the plants in my office before it could be classified a wild refuge reserve.
But thankfully I am once again home. Dinner has been cooked, consumed and cleaned up after, all in one fell swoop. (Striking a Super Girl pose.) The minor child is currently torturing our resident cat, Emma. Tonight's ensemble consists of one lace bib sans dress, red ribbons and the unfortunate placing of multi-colored hair ties attached to all 4 paws. (You didn't think I was talking about the minor child did you?)
I'm almost inclined to save the cat from further humiliation but she looks like she is enjoying her play time. OK ... Maybe that is stretching the truth somewhat. But I am exacting my revenge for her latest escapade which involved one closet and several clothing carrying hangers which were mysteriously found on the floor last evening. Closets are now completely off limits to little black cats who formerly used said quarters for an afternoon nap.
I must go now and make some hot cocoa to heat myself back up. These frigid temperatures for the past few weeks have left me mostly numb all the way down to my toes. But that as they say, is life in the great Northeast.
** Alarm Clock Log **
5 a.m. Ringer, Snoozed Twice, Turned off Once and Out of Bed Approximately 10 or so Minutes Later. Not at all bad for a Tuesday.
1-27-03
Monday nights are my chore nights. The night of the week when I am supposed to be somewhat responsible and catch up on the menial tasks that I intentionally chose to ignore over the weekend. Tonight I got so far as cleaning the bathroom toilet before deciding that if I looked hard enough, I could find something much better and far more enjoyable to do with my time.
Immediately the little voice of procrastination that is constantly buzzing around my head offered up an option. "Phone a friend." whispered the voice, "Don't do the laundry." Why is it the little voice in my head has this bad habit of sounding like Ozzy Osbourne lately? OK ... Fine! I can admit it, I am an Osbourne addict! But tell me are you Tough Enough? Now would be a good time for anyone who knows of an MTV detox center to email me with the info. But back to the phone call ...
My best friend Bren is getting married for the second time. Her first hubby was to say the least not a winner. Wow, I just realized that that was very diplomatic of me. Anyhow she has been planning the wedding details for the last month or so. Bren has decided she doesn't want to go with your average church wedding and the last time we spoke was planning to get married in a "Diamond" Mine. Somehow getting married far below the surface of the earth doesn't exactly say happy tidings of joy to me ... But then again, I've already got quite a distorted view of the whole marriage thing, so it could just be me.
Tonight however she has pulled herself out from the core of the earth and has decided flying over Niagara Falls in a helicopter while saying, "I do." is a far better option. I wonder if puke bags are part of the wedding package? I may suggest she find that out in advance of her wedding flight ... Ahhh, but what a story that would be to tell the grandkids some day.
Bren and I talked a while longer before the children screaming for attention in the background finally became too loud to ignore. Parents who go "ga ga" over their child's first words will soon learn that once they can talk, the blessed sound of silence is forever extinguished. Trust me, I have a seven year old, I know.
But as for me tonight, the hour grows late and my alarm clock is set for the cheerful hour of 5 a.m. Too darn early in my opinion but management has yet to consider my suggestion of a dramatically altered work schedule of 11:30 p.m. to 1:00 p.m. Where's the progressive management people?
Monday nights are my chore nights. The night of the week when I am supposed to be somewhat responsible and catch up on the menial tasks that I intentionally chose to ignore over the weekend. Tonight I got so far as cleaning the bathroom toilet before deciding that if I looked hard enough, I could find something much better and far more enjoyable to do with my time.
Immediately the little voice of procrastination that is constantly buzzing around my head offered up an option. "Phone a friend." whispered the voice, "Don't do the laundry." Why is it the little voice in my head has this bad habit of sounding like Ozzy Osbourne lately? OK ... Fine! I can admit it, I am an Osbourne addict! But tell me are you Tough Enough? Now would be a good time for anyone who knows of an MTV detox center to email me with the info. But back to the phone call ...
My best friend Bren is getting married for the second time. Her first hubby was to say the least not a winner. Wow, I just realized that that was very diplomatic of me. Anyhow she has been planning the wedding details for the last month or so. Bren has decided she doesn't want to go with your average church wedding and the last time we spoke was planning to get married in a "Diamond" Mine. Somehow getting married far below the surface of the earth doesn't exactly say happy tidings of joy to me ... But then again, I've already got quite a distorted view of the whole marriage thing, so it could just be me.
Tonight however she has pulled herself out from the core of the earth and has decided flying over Niagara Falls in a helicopter while saying, "I do." is a far better option. I wonder if puke bags are part of the wedding package? I may suggest she find that out in advance of her wedding flight ... Ahhh, but what a story that would be to tell the grandkids some day.
Bren and I talked a while longer before the children screaming for attention in the background finally became too loud to ignore. Parents who go "ga ga" over their child's first words will soon learn that once they can talk, the blessed sound of silence is forever extinguished. Trust me, I have a seven year old, I know.
But as for me tonight, the hour grows late and my alarm clock is set for the cheerful hour of 5 a.m. Too darn early in my opinion but management has yet to consider my suggestion of a dramatically altered work schedule of 11:30 p.m. to 1:00 p.m. Where's the progressive management people?
