Wiping the Slate Clean

I was reading one of my regular blogs tonight when something she said really hit home ... (L ... I hope you don't mind.)

This has always been the Petitioner’s “modus operandi”– the Petitioner consistently threatens and harasses the Respondent when he does not “get his way” while steadfastly refusing to comply with the Stipulations previously agreed to. Almost every letter the Petitioner has written contains the threat of taking the Respondent back to court, leaving the Respondent feeling she must comply with his demands.

Boy, have I been there, and it's like making deals with the devil and letting someone walk all over you, just to get a little peace in your life, so you can live it without full out drama all of the time. You give up on fixing things you know need to be fixed because you can't handle the stress. And it feels like you're handling it all alone. And no one has your back ...

For the past five years, I've ignored a pretty big problem, because I didn't want the stress of going back to court, and because I got tired of trying to fight all my battles on my own. I know those threats well ... The kind of threats some people make that make you decide not to rock the boat, because you know if you do, they're going to send some pretty big waves in your direction. And when you're only trying to stay afloat, the last thing you want are waves ...

But I'm making waves now. And I'm rocking the boat. And I'm saying you know what, do your worst, I'm not scared of you anymore. I've waited five years to stand up to you and even if the courts don't grant me every last cent you owe, damn it will still feel good.

So when we're sitting across from each other at that table tomorrow, and you're looking for someone to blame, take a really long look at yourself Pinnochio, and then maybe instead of being a wooden boy, you'll be a real man.