I killed a cat today and I feel pretty damn shitty. I know when it comes right down to it, that when it's between your safety and an animal in the middle of the road, it's the animal in the road that has to go.

I saw him too late to make a difference.

This little tiny kitten, a gray ball of fluff dripping wet watching my headlights approaching, staring straight as me as I tried to break in time to miss him. I tried to swerve, even though I was cautious of roads slick with rain. But at the last second he moved, trying to avoid me as I was trying to avoid him.

I heard the thump as tire and cat collided, and I knew I hit him. And even though I turned around to check and see if maybe I had missed him, I knew he was dead. My headlights illuminating the darkness and his broken body crumpled in the middle of the road. I put my head down on my steering wheel and cried.

I kept seeing the moment right before I hit him, wishing there were some way I could turn back time and take an extra second picking KC up at the sitters, or leave work a minute later than I did. Anything so I wouldn't have been there at the time that kitten decided to cross the road.

But what was worse, was having KC in the car when all this happened. The both of us sat there like ninnies crying our eyes out.

Picking up my cell phone, I almost called my Father, wanting to rant and rave at him for not picking KC up after school and taking her to dance class. Thinking that I could use my anger as a way to appease the overwhelming guilt I felt for killing one of God's creatures. I called my Mother instead.

Mom's are good for making you feel better about bad situations, although I still felt and feel pretty bad over the whole thing. Still I needed to hear someone else say that no animal, cute kitten or not, is worth risking your own life to save.

So even if no one hears it. I'm so sorry.