Resolving Doors

The girls have taken over Guitar Hero leaving me nothing else to do but get down to the nasty business of writing out my resolution list for 2008. Resolutions, mind you I will most likely break within five minutes of the New Year beginning.

Despite this, I feel it necessary to write them anyway. Although I have decided after perusing some of my old lists that I may have to be a bit more realistic this year than I have managed to be in previous ones. I mean really, swim with sharks and not get eaten? Sure it's good for a laugh, but you and I both know there's no way I'd be caught dead in a bathing suit!

It would also appear that I'm failing in the meeting a man with limited issues department. True to the form that is my life, the only men I ever come into contact with are those with more issues than I've got time to mention or the patience to deal with. And seriously, is normal too much to hope for?

And no, playing monopoly without cheating is never ever going to happen for me either. If you let me be the banker, you can damn well bet I'll be getting a lot more than two hundred dollars for passing go. And while I know this is a major personality flaw, and I really shouldn't admit to it, I can honestly say that the only time I would actually embezzle anything is when it involves paper money of the fictional kind. I mean really, I do have a little self discipline occasionally.

I'm also going to scrap the thought of not sticking my tongue out at my co-workers or saluting my boss in the hallway whenever we happen to cross paths. Although I do take issue with what he said the other day before I absconded on vacation. It went a little something like this...

"Captain," I said, followed by a crisp navy salute as I passed him in the hall.

He responded in kind with a quick salute of his own, a smarmy smile licking at his lips and quipped, "Four eyes."

And I'm telling you, that while it was a bitch ass move for a comeback, I had to give him mad respect for the juvenile way in which it was given. After all, not many men pushing the big Hawaii five-o could have pulled it off with such convincing aplomb.

Which brings me back to my resolution list which I've still yet to start... Okay. Must think. Like lent, it's all about giving up the things you don't really give too much of a fig about. To save my mortal soul however, I'm going to pretend I never said anything just now about lent... I mean, cause I wouldn't actually do anything like that... Ever.

Nope...

Not me.

Not Stacey middle and last name omitted to the protect the personal privacy of the person who writes this blog...

I'm going to hell, aren't I?

Anyhoo... Resolutions. Got to keep them coming here. Have to think of at least one that doesn't involve anything too, well involved.

Here goes...

Stacey's Year of 2008 Resolutions

1. Donate blood. Get free cookie and orange juice!
2.