Children should be quarantined until they reach the age of 30. After a day like today, I'm quite sure pigtails and pint size people, are really clever little buggers of mischief and mayhem in disguise.

Normally I find my niece quiet and charming, a nice alternative to KC's loud and louder still. But today's visit was far different. Today, I was counting down the minutes, until her Mother would arrive to take her home.

The trip to Wally world alone could have landed me in the loony bin. The girls, who begged to go together, spent the entire time arguing, as to who would hold onto the cart and who would get to ride shotgun.

Of course, it was just my luck that the cart I chose had a bum wheel, making it next to impossible to allow either girl the coveted riding position. Still, I gave it a try, utilizing every ounce of my strength to push one and hold onto the other, while doing my best to keep the cart from crashing into fellow shoppers, as we cruised from aisle to aisle.

To make matters worse, KC had five dollars burning a hole in her pocket and decided that come heaven or H E double hockey sticks, she wasn't leaving Walmart without emptying her purse of its life savings.

Thanks to my Mother, the giver of the dratted 5 dollars, I landed directly into toyland torture. I can get through this, I lied to myself, as we began the vile descent into Barbie village. It was then the loud shrieking began ...

"Mommeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! I waaaaaannnttt thisssssss!" said KC, pointing to everything within eyesight.

"Saycee ... I wan this too." Jordy said tugging at my arm, her soft little voice, and puppy dog eyes pleading with me.

Be cool. I reminded myself. You can do this. Just say NO! Hundreds of people say no everyday. KC meanwhile, was making her way down the aisle faster than a flash flood. For a girl with 5 dollars, her tastes sure were running expensive, I thought, waving first one and then another toy away.

"$5 dollars." I reminded her. "5 which is not 10, not 20, and certainly nothing above that either." I said, shaking my head as she reached for yet another unobtainable item. Evidently my little math instruction on what 5 dollars was and wasn't, wasn't worth much more than 3 seconds of her short attention span.

Though it could have been a faulty florescent, I swear, just at the moment when I was about to well and truly lose my mind, a beam of light, accompanied by the sound of an angelic choir, settled on a lonely item tucked back on a dusty shelf.

Lightning grabbed it, holding it to her chest in a giant bear hug, a giant smile spreading across her face. "Shrinkidinks!" she cried, holding them above her head for all the world to see.

I half expected her to twist back around and sit down in the middle of the aisle while crooning, "Mine, all mine. Precious ..." Lucky for me, Lord of the Rings was not a movie she'd been allowed to see.

Armed with her prize, KC decided that Jordy should be able to get something too. "Here you go Jordy." she said, randomly plucking a toy from the shelf. "You can get this."

My jaw dropped to the floor. Normally a nice gesture from cousin to cousin would be cause for me to celebrate. However, KC's little moment of kindness had me wanting to throttle her.

"Are you planning on paying for that?" I asked her, trying to keep my eyes from bugging out of my head as I read the price tag.

Hands on hips, her mouth puckered up into a saucy bow, KC got ready for her moment in the spotlight.

"Well, she needed something too, ya know. It shouldn't be fair that I'm the only one getting something here." Her toe began to tap.

"You're absolutely right darling ... But it doesn't need to be a forty dollar item that you're telling her she can have. If you had just waited a moment, I could have found her something a little more affordable on my own. Now I have to take that away and convince your cousin that she really wants something else."

Jordy not being a fool, increased her hold on the toy, unwilling to let it go. "Mine Saycee.", she said. "Dis is Mine."