To be honest with you all, I'm not feeling all that festive tonight. Save for the multi-colored lights sparkling on the tree, I'm sitting here in the dark listening to Christmas music by myself. A dreadful way of making yourself a bit miserable when you're already feeling blue.
KC is at her Dad's for the night and won't be home until noon tomorrow. A couple of years ago, we decided to be fair and alternate Christmas Eve and Christmas morning because it would be the best thing for KC. But to be honest, on the years that aren't mine, I spend the entire night with a broken heart just waiting for her to come home.
But I'll get through it, passing the time away just thinking about the look on her face when she gets home and opens that one special gift she was hoping would be under the tree.
Until then I think I'll have a glass of wine, reflect on the Christmas spirit, and kick myself for not getting my wayward soul into a church this year.
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3 comments:
Those that have said to me that they dislike, or hate Christmas usually feel like that because in the hub-bub of celebrating love, and family, and all that you have, it inevitably shows up anything that is cracked or missing.
Having her away from you tonight must be torture, I think I know how I would feel, dare say it would be worse though. It's a shame you can't all spent it together, put the past away for a night and have an extended family. Though the past isn't always willing to be shutout, I know.
Being home alone like that is the last thing, the church idea is reasonable, good company goes a long way.
On the bright side, she'll be back in a flash, hopefully beaming from ear to ear. What better present is there than that? Christmas is love.
Words are also a pretty good present. Especially when someone takes the time to say something nice, something supportive, something out of the blue.
I thank you for your gift. It has done wonders for my soul.
Words are all I can give, they are free, and thus should be given just as freely. Such that they are.
Glad they helped. :)
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